Stress level decreasing

First topic message reminder :

Ever get the feeling that everyone should be made to go bush for at least 3 months of every year to reduce their stress levels..

The place would be a better place I reckon--

the off shute would be that there would b a heap of women out there ready to say hi and cook me a decent meal--I.m over baked bloody beans and sardines..


U know what I mean..


Regards

Oneday69

Sorry guys i had to go eat,
filled me guts with veges and meat.
But now that im back from all the yum yum,
i'll be gone again soon to empty me bum.

And with a bum like yours it'l take all day
they will smell the dump for miles away
as you squat near a tree paper in hand
and you release the pressure outta that gland

Just gotta signal and in went the pick
Dug some dirt out and Oh what a stink
Who left this nugget, it's not what I want
The rotten berstards been drinking Pete's Plonk

I said "have a sip old Narra's me mate"
but make sure ya dont drink the lot
he up ended the bottle and drained it all out
and its something ive never forgot

He says "pete me old son dont go jumping the gun
it was only a swig that i had"
He said "and dont give me no more of that rotgut for sure
cause it made me crap stink really bad"

I like a drop of the old musty red,
Iv drunken them all till im nearly dead.
Keep lid on where it is that i spew,
and stop the old guy from digging it too.

but dig it he did for 3 long hours,
and he chiseled the caprock out,
then all of a sudden he did a wild jig
and he pulled a 20 oz out..

Now diggin holes I don't mind
I also like to leave some nugs behind
But 20oz of paper and crap
Is enuff to get a sane man in a flap

Now Narra's was pissed on seeing the lump
"i shoulda scanned that spot before takin that dump"
but the bloke who dug deeper got the shock of his life
the nugget was brown and he was really in strife

But dig it he did, he dug near to Hell
found a big nug, he thought he was swell
T'was xmas he thought and then he did yell
It's a browny, damn me it smells

he began to think after diggin that stink
"from whence did that perfume come"
so he moved off the ground that produced all that brown
from the patch thats now known as "the Bum"

Sent a newbie to the bum patch today,
a coin came back or withered a frayed.
its been there a while an SD one im sure,
the newbie will dig the bum patch no more.

To the club goes the newb all proud as can be
with that coin in his soft girly hand
He starts braggin it up and he tells of the dig
and how the coin it tasted real grand

A grand in the hand cried the newbie at heart,
the coin that came out along with a fart.
Dug from the depths from an old SD hole,
to the newbie at heart its still classed as gold.

Sorry guys i had to go eat,
filled me guts with veges and meat.
But now that im back from all the yum yum,
i'll be gone again soon to empty me bum.

And with a bum like yours it'l take all day
they will smell the dump for miles away
as you squat near a tree paper in hand
and you release the pressure outta that gland

Just gotta signal and in went the pick
Dug some dirt out and Oh what a stink
Who left this nugget, it's not what I want
The rotten berstards been drinking Pete's Plonk

I said "have a sip old Narra's me mate"
but make sure ya dont drink the lot
he up ended the bottle and drained it all out
and its something ive never forgot

He says "pete me old son dont go jumping the gun
it was only a swig that i had"
He said "and dont give me no more of that rotgut for sure
cause it made me crap stink really bad"

I like a drop of the old musty red,
Iv drunken them all till im nearly dead.
Keep lid on where it is that i spew,
and stop the old guy from digging it too.

but dig it he did for 3 long hours,
and he chiseled the caprock out,
then all of a sudden he did a wild jig
and he pulled a 20 oz out..

Now diggin holes I don't mind
I also like to leave some nugs behind
But 20oz of paper and crap
Is enuff to get a sane man in a flap

Now Narra's was pissed on seeing the lump
"i shoulda scanned that spot before takin that dump"
but the bloke who dug deeper got the shock of his life
the nugget was brown and he was really in strife

But dig it he did, he dug near to Hell
found a big nug, he thought he was swell
T'was xmas he thought and then he did yell
It's a browny, damn me it smells

he began to think after diggin that stink
"from whence did that perfume come"
so he moved off the ground that produced all that brown
from the patch thats now known as "the Bum"

Sent a newbie to the bum patch today,
a coin came back or withered a frayed.
its been there a while an SD one im sure,
the newbie will dig the bum patch no more.

To the club goes the newb all proud as can be
with that coin in his soft girly hand
He starts braggin it up and he tells of the dig
and how the coin it tasted real grand

So the moral of the story, so they tell me
Is always do it near a tree
It'll grow strong from your buried nuggets and people will say fugget
And an idiot will come along with a QED

Sorry guys i had to go eat,
filled me guts with veges and meat.
But now that im back from all the yum yum,
i'll be gone again soon to empty me bum.

And with a bum like yours it'l take all day
they will smell the dump for miles away
as you squat near a tree paper in hand
and you release the pressure outta that gland

Just gotta signal and in went the pick
Dug some dirt out and Oh what a stink
Who left this nugget, it's not what I want
The rotten berstards been drinking Pete's Plonk

I said "have a sip old Narra's me mate"
but make sure ya dont drink the lot
he up ended the bottle and drained it all out
and its something ive never forgot

He says "pete me old son dont go jumping the gun
it was only a swig that i had"
He said "and dont give me no more of that rotgut for sure
cause it made me crap stink really bad"

I like a drop of the old musty red,
Iv drunken them all till im nearly dead.
Keep lid on where it is that i spew,
and stop the old guy from digging it too.

but dig it he did for 3 long hours,
and he chiseled the caprock out,
then all of a sudden he did a wild jig
and he pulled a 20 oz out..

Now diggin holes I don't mind
I also like to leave some nugs behind
But 20oz of paper and crap
Is enuff to get a sane man in a flap

Now Narra's was pissed on seeing the lump
"i shoulda scanned that spot before takin that dump"
but the bloke who dug deeper got the shock of his life
the nugget was brown and he was really in strife

But dig it he did, he dug near to Hell
found a big nug, he thought he was swell
T'was xmas he thought and then he did yell
It's a browny, damn me it smells

he began to think after diggin that stink
"from whence did that perfume come"
so he moved off the ground that produced all that brown
from the patch thats now known as "the Bum"

Sent a newbie to the bum patch today,
a coin came back or withered a frayed.
its been there a while an SD one im sure,
the newbie will dig the bum patch no more.

To the club goes the newb all proud as can be
with that coin in his soft girly hand
He starts braggin it up and he tells of the dig
and how the coin it tasted real grand

Next thing that you know the whole clubs wants to go
to the Bum patch to see if there's more
after 3 long days tectin the turds they collectin
that came from hells back door.

Now the newb is all flash and he walks with a dash
cause he found a real patch of good coins
but the patch that he found in that stinky old ground
was the fruit of old narrawa's loins

So the moral of the story, so they tell me
Is always do it near a tree
It'll grow strong from your buried nuggets and people will say fugget
And an idiot will come along with a QED

There was a young man named Pete
Who was always lookin down at his feet

NEXT

There was a young man named Pete
Who was always lookin down at his feet
for he had 30 toes and a thumb on each foot
and they carried him well down the street

There was a young man named Pete
Who was always lookin down at his feet
for he had 30 toes and a thumb on each foot
and they carried him well down the street

They carried him well all day long and all night
and they gave empty tinnies a shunt
but the funny thing was they where fitted all wrong
cause his feet where stuck on back to front

There was a young man named Pete
Who was always lookin down at his feet
for he had 30 toes and a thumb on each foot
and they carried him well down the street

They carried him well all day long and all night
and they gave empty tinnies a shunt
but the funny thing was they where fitted all wrong
cause his feet where stuck on back to front

His boots they were big and they had extra width
and a hole for the thumb to poke out
and he looked such a treat as he walked down the street
with his lips all pursed up in a pout.

Crazy Pete wrote:There was a young man named Pete
Who was always lookin down at his feet
for he had 30 toes and a thumb on each foot
and they carried him well down the street

They carried him well all day long and all night
and they gave empty tinnies a shunt
but the funny thing was they where fitted all wrong
cause his feet where stuck on back to front

Well, Pete was a likeable lad
And reckoned he was pretty bad
With the ladies you see
Out at the BP
Where perving became a fun fad.........

Well, Pete was a likeable lad
And reckoned he was pretty bad
With the ladies you see
Out at the BP
Where perving became a fun fad.

in fact quiet an art he did make that perv seem
in the fruit and veggie isle
he would walk up and say "can i have me own way"
and girls they all blushed and they smiled

Well, Pete was a likeable lad
And reckoned he was pretty bad
With the ladies you see
Out at the BP
Where perving became a fun fad.

in fact quiet an art he did make that perv seem
in the fruit and veggie isle
he would walk up and say "can i have me own way"
and girls they all blushed and they smiled

some girls thought 'what a dag" in his cordueroy drag
but to him it was all he could muster
but the girls they all swooned as he spun his crap lines
and they all went red faced and got flustered

Well, Pete was a likeable lad
And reckoned he was pretty bad
With the ladies you see
Out at the BP
Where perving became a fun fad.

in fact quiet an art he did make that perv seem
in the fruit and veggie isle
he would walk up and say "can i have me own way"
and girls they all blushed and they smiled

some girls thought 'what a dag" in his cordueroy drag
but to him it was all he could muster
but the girls they all swooned as he spun his crap lines
and they all went red faced and got flustered

For it wasnt their love that he wanted that day
even tho he did make them girls drool
it was only the docket that them poor girls held
and he wanted 4c off his fuel

:rolf: :rolf: :rolf:

Crazy Pete wrote:Well, Pete was a likeable lad
And reckoned he was pretty bad
With the ladies you see
Out at the BP
Where perving became a fun fad.

in fact quiet an art he did make that perv seem
in the fruit and veggie isle
he would walk up and say "can i have me own way"
and girls they all blushed and they smiled

Pete thought he was onto a winner
and picked up bananas for dinner
but the girls all looked down
and with a big frown
said 'your feet make you look like a sinner'

Well, Pete was a likeable lad
And reckoned he was pretty bad
With the ladies you see
Out at the BP
Where perving became a fun fad.

in fact quiet an art he did make that perv seem
in the fruit and veggie isle
he would walk up and say "can i have me own way"
and girls they all blushed and they smiled

some girls thought 'what a dag" in his cordueroy drag
but to him it was all he could muster
but the girls they all swooned as he spun his crap lines
and they all went red faced and got flustered

Flustered they may he can do it all day,
the girls round here will lie to you not.
Yet one shied away from Pete just today,
as his nostril was showing some snot.

There was a young man named Pete
Who was always lookin down at his feet
for he had 30 toes and a thumb on each foot
and they carried him well down the street

They carried him well all day long and all night
and they gave empty tinnies a shunt
but the funny thing was they where fitted all wrong
cause his feet where stuck on back to front

His boots they were big and they had extra width
and a hole for the thumb to poke out
and he looked such a treat as he walked down the street
with his lips all pursed up in a pout.
Well, Pete was a likeable lad
And reckoned he was pretty bad
With the ladies you see
Out at the BP
Where perving became a fun fad.........
in fact quiet an art he did make that perv seem
in the fruit and veggie isle
he would walk up and say "can i have me own way"
and girls they all blushed and they smiled

some girls thought 'what a dag" in his cordueroy drag
but to him it was all he could muster
but the girls they all swooned as he spun his crap lines
and they all went red faced and got flustered

Now the gals at the BP were smart it would seem
Fore they had seen them ugly big feet
when they knew he was coming
Outa town they'd be running, never again to be seen

Pete thought he was onto a winner
and picked up bananas for dinner
but the girls all looked down
and with a big frown
said 'your feet make you look like a sinner'

With banana in hand he hatched a good plan
'i'll just shove this thing down me tight dacks"
and i'll swagger right up and i'll say these good words
" do you like the big bulge in me slacks"

Pete thought he was onto a winner
and picked up bananas for dinner
but the girls all looked down
and with a big frown
said 'your feet make you look like a sinner'

With banana in hand he hatched a good plan
'i'll just shove this thing down me tight dacks"
and i'll swagger right up and i'll say these good words
" do you like the big bulge in me slacks"
Well, the bulge was all well and good
Till it started slipping not like it should
It ended around the back
And right in his crack
that cleared the BP as it would!

:rolf: :rolf: :rolf: :rolf: :rolf:
I can't keep up but this is good :rolf:

Salami, Banana, Bratwurst or Phat
as long as you keep it down in ya dacks
the chicks at BP, say don't come see me
just warn us when ya on ya way back

I keep getting telaphoneinterupticus. :rolf:

Bignuggs wrote:Salami, Banana, Bratwurst or Phat
as long as you keep it down in ya dacks
the chicks at BP, say don't come see me
just warn us when ya on ya way back

:rolf: good one to finish cliff...

Then there was Sam the mongrel from Blighty
He hits WA wailing "Christ all mighty"
What am I in for from Pete, Cliff and Ray?
And the rest of these loonies not kept at bay.

Robert

Then there was Sam the mongrel from Blighty
He hits WA wailing "Christ all mighty"
What am I in for from Pete, Cliff and Ray?
And the rest of these loonies not kept at bay.

Mentioning Sam from the old crappy blighty
he goes to the diggins in a pink floral nighty
with his bunny slippers on and his cute button nose
in his detecting gear he strikes a good pose.

For its modeling and catwalks that take old Sams heart
in his heels and his hose he can make a good start
with his lippy and rouge he struts around town
but out bush if in front dont you ever bend down.

Then theirs Robert called Bobert a bloke from Dunolly
the rumors abound about his rubber dolly
"its all bloody lies" cries Robert "tis true"
but at his age a number 15 Inghams will do.

And the youngest of all goes by the name of Big Chop
The poor lad dreams gold and he just cant stop
but its rubbers he wants when he goes to the shop
just incase some fine lady will climb up on top.

Then there was Sam the mongrel from Blighty
He hits WA wailing "Christ all mighty"
What am I in for from Pete, Cliff and Ray?
And the rest of these loonies not kept at bay.

Mentioning Sam from the old crappy blighty
he goes to the diggins in a pink floral nighty
with his bunny slippers on and his cute button nose
in his detecting gear he strikes a good pose.

For its modeling and catwalks that take old Sams heart
in his heels and his hose he can make a good start
with his lippy and rouge he struts around town
but out bush if in front dont you ever bend down.

Then theirs Robert called Bobert a bloke from Dunolly
the rumors abound about his rubber dolly
"its all bloody lies" cries Robert "tis true"
but at his age a number 15 Inghams will do.

And the youngest of all goes by the name of Big Chop
The poor lad dreams gold and he just cant stop
but its rubbers he wants when he goes to the shop
just incase some fine lady will climb up on top.

Then ya got Ray who goes by "oneday"
And one day in K town he dropped by
Twas never the same in that hole of a town
When Ray started sellin' his tyres